Tuesday, March 24, 2009


Last week was filled with such joy.

There is nothing like watching our kids meeting their forever families. There's an energy and excitement that is impossible to contain. But in the midst of all the celebration, we hurt when we see the vulnerable hearts of the kids who have not yet been matched.

And so, Friday was a bit of a tough day for our Emily.

At 5 years old, she's now one of our oldest children. She's bright and energetic - full of bubbling laughter and just a little mischief. She's a little tougher than most of our kids, not always letting herself be cuddled for long. We are so excited for the day when she'll be matched with a family - that day just hasn't come yet.

On Friday afternoon, our foster home was filled with anticipation as Abigail met her family for the first time. The children, nannies, and other staff were all excitedly sharing this unforgettable moment with them.

I was a little late walking into the playroom when Emily met me at the door.

She was on the verge of tears and held her arms up to me. I carried her over to the far end of the room, where we settled in on the sofa. Almost immediately she asked me, "Am I pretty?" I told her that she was BEAUTIFUL. She then told me that she could speak English - and started speaking every English sentence that came to her mind.

"Happy Birthday!"

"I love you!"

And then she began counting in English. "One, two..." When she got to "three," she attempted the word over and over again, trying to get the pronunciation just right.


After several tries, she buried her face in my neck and started to cry.

Moments like these are so hard. Emily is such a precious girl, and all she wants to know is that she's worthy of being loved. She wants to believe that somewhere out there is a family that sees her as beautiful and smart and everything they hope for in a daughter. She wants to know that someday our playroom will be filled with laughter and joyful tears and lots of hugs - all for HER.

We know that day will come for Emily, as it will for all our kids. And part of the privilege of being here is getting to hold them tight, kiss away their tears, and tell them their parents are coming soon.


  1. Oh how my heart breaks that there are so many "Emily's" out there. I know it breaks God's heart too. May many feel the call, step out in faith and bring them home. Please hug her a little for me.

  2. This just breaks my heart!!! We would take her too if China would let us. I'll be sending up special prayers just for Emily to be matched SOON!

    Sending hugs and kisses to all of them!!

  3. Heartbreaking. Wish I could bring her home and be her mama!

  4. Oh Carrie,
    My heart is literally aching for little Emily and I can barely see enough to type through my tears. It's interesting that this was posted today, as I wondered how the other kids felt seeing their friends meet their forever families, when they have yet to be matched. Especially the older ones! Please tell her how much she is loved and how very special she is! We will definitely be praying for her forever family to come SOON, as well as for the other waiting children!! God bless you for all that you do and for being a shoulder to cry on and love on them in return. You are all in my prayers! <><

    ~Tanya Thom

  5. Praying Emily finds a forever family soon. Is she listed yet with CCAA? I know many families looking to adopt an older child including ourselves....

  6. I've read this post three times, and three times, I have cried, with tears pouring down my face. She has captured my heart. My heart breaks for Emily, who longs to feel worthy of being loved. I wish we could be that family that she so desperately wants and needs. I'd be there in a heartbeat if we had the financial resources to adopt her. In the meantime, I pray she will find that inner peace, that feeling of being loved.

    Thank you for sharing her on this blog.

  7. Any idea what the status of her paper work is?? You can email me through our blog...

  8. I would love to adopt her! I'm in the Waiting Child Program with CCAI but even if I requested all her needs and age range, there is no guarantee she will be mine:(

  9. Emily is so beautiful! If I were still eligible to adopt from China I would start the process to adopt her today. Tell her there are many people all over the world who have her in their hearts.

  10. I also am just heart broken reading about sweet Emily. What a beautiful child. I would do anything for her to me mine - oh how I wish I could give these precious child a home.


  11. This just broke my heart! I'm sure you get this question all the time, but is it possible to adopt the children that are in your foster home, specifically Emily? What do we need to do????

  12. Emily preciosa y dulce niña, encantada sería tu mami, pero los requisitos de familias monoparentales me lo impidenm ojala pronto tengas a tu familia que te quiera.

    Kisses, Alicia, mami de Beatriz y Lúa Shu

    WanZhou-Chongqing, agosto 2005